The Marriage Relationship

Pregnancy is sometimes referred to as a "crisis" point in marriage due to the unusual amount of stress placed on the partners as individuals and on their emotional partnership. A troubled marriage is especially vulnerable to stress, but even the strongest marriage benefits from some special attention.

As you progress through pregnancy and into parenting, encourage your mate to express his feelings and try to help him understand yours. Especially during the early months of pregnancy, a new father may worry about his ability to support the family, or about the effects of the pregnancy on the marriage. Because the physical aspects of pregnancy at this point are all yours, he may have a difficult time feeling involved in the pregnancy.

Encourage him to talk to other fathers and to take an active role in the pregnancy, perhaps by accompanying you to a prenatal checkup to meet and talk with your doctor. Adapt your pregnancy fitness goals to reflect a concern for fatherly fitness, and suggest ways he can involve himself with your joint physical well-being—massage, cooking healthful meals, or accompanying you on evening walks.

Remember, too, that he may not come across pregnancy information as readily as you do. You can help build a feeling of partnership by sharing helpful articles or insights, encouraging his questions, and rewarding his questions with honest, thoughtful answers.

As with any relationship issues, if you and your mate reach a troublesome impasse, professional counseling may be highly effective in helping you progress together to a more satisfying common ground.

Plotting Your Pregnancy . . .

Navigating your way through relationship changes may prove to be one of the biggest challenges of the pregnancy experience. Pregnancy transforms a woman's body temporarily, but it changes her life forever. Pregnancy is much more than a "health condition." It is a life transition—a bridge from one period of your life to another. The more you understand about what's happening within your body and in your relationships with others, the more likely you'll be able to enjoy this time and make a successful transition to your new life!

Exerpted from A Woman's Own Guide to Pregnancy and Childbirth, Women's Healthcare Press.